We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
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