i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
Randomize
