she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
At front desk. Got a beer drinking pigeon.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize