Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize