fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
I pretty much envision me eating a turkey leg whilst fucking you. I have priorities.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
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