my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
So this is how i'm celebrating Easter? By eating chicken nuggets and masturbating all day. What a life.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
