this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize