I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Randomize
