Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Randomize
