Do vagina's smell?
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
