You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Randomize
