You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
Dude I just masturbated laying underneath my Christmas tree. Apparently all I want for Christmas is to get laid.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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