This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
Randomize
