And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
