At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
He asked me not to hook up with anyone else because it would hurt his feelings.. while his arm was around his pregnant girlfriend.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Randomize
