we're chasing vodka with high fives
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
