i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Randomize
