I think scott just propositioned me for sex
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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