I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
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