How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
the gnome is staring at me and the pineapple is wearing shorts. I don't want to do this anymore.
Randomize
