Don't make out with my wife yet
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I got a lap dance from a guy last night dressed as a school girl. Heels and all. His heels got stuck in my fish nets
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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