I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Just peed in a urinal with another girl. It's that kind of night.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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