Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
