i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize
