So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
