uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
Hydrocodon makes you feel like a fairy made out of pudding
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
