Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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