I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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