Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
stalking the twitter feeds of girls who have fucked my current fuck buddy makes me glad we use condoms
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
Randomize
