She is in my trunk
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
My breath smells like gin and sadness
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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