got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
