i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I was too hungover to read the menu. I literally pointed at a picture of an advertisement and handed the cashier my card
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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