You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
I'm no doctor but I don't think balls are supposed to look like that.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
