We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I saw he had me in his phone as "the fat twin"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize
