so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
