Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Is your answer to that text seriously a right parenthesis
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
Randomize
