so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
