your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
