we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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