My friends, they love my intelligence
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
I am nonfunctional stoned. I had to ask ben to put me somewhere away from all the people I'm sitting on someones bed watching a wall. Not alright. Should not have come.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I'm also sorry that I ate your chicken sandwich while you were throwing up....
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
