Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
she was so not down for the gang bang
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Randomize
