Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
