First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
There's a paramedic out here, what have you done?
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
I need to wash the frat house off of me
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize
