It wouldn't matter if you are Jesus Christ himself, you are not getting into the bar tonight
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
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