i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
My life is pants optional.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize