is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
He told his wife he was too old to pretend to be straight. She tried to argue. He walked two tables over and was like this is my highschool sweetheart and he's an excellent fuck, we're running away together. It was epic.
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