I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize