Do vagina's smell?
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
i believe in u and ur pee
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
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