Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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