did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
