So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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